A Better Way To Forgive

I am always at choice as to how I respond to someone else's behavior.  And - I can believe that I have even drawn some people into my life for an experience that will require forgiveness.

But, sometimes, while I do know that forgiveness, in the long run, is really for me, I still am challenged by the rituals required to look past a hurt or grievance that was done to me.  

Maybe the problem is that I am pushed and prodded toward forgiveness practices as the ONLY way to heal my soul.  Do I need to work at forgiveness?  Do I need to practice it regularly?

Instead, why can't I just let it go?  

When I am offended by someone's hurtful comments, do I need to work at seeing them as a perfect reflection of Spirit?   Or can I just release it?

When I have been insulted and belittled, do I need to practice praying for their highest and best, knowing they are doing the best they can?  Or can I simply let it go?

When I have been disappointed in the outcome at work or in a relationship, do I need to silently wish them well, knowing they have no idea they hurt my feelings?  Or can I just let it be?

Perhaps, it's ME who can go beyond the limits of my conditioning, entrenched in the race consciousness that forgiveness work is the ONLY way to be set free.   I have learned the lesson that it does me no good to hold onto anger.  So I let it go.

I realize that my vulnerability, in some cases, opens me up to possible hurtful experiences.  And so, I can let it go.

I am not compelled toward lengthy forgiveness practices, though there are times when the ritual of it does let me see things differently.  But - I'm not stuck there.   I acknowledge the hurt.  And I let it go.  No demands.  No judgements.

So, what are YOUR thoughts?  Do you need forgiveness rituals or can you just let it go?

Today, I set the intention to remember that I am always at choice when I am feeling hurt or betrayed,  and to simply let it go.

"It is important to expect nothing, to take every experience, including

 the negative ones, as merely steps on the path, and to proceed."  

~Ram Dass

"The truth is more important than the facts."  

~Frank Lloyd Wright

Affirmative Prayer:
In the serenity of this moment, there is an awareness of the One Divine Wisdom.   It whispers through the tress and sings as sweetly as the birds; a beautiful melody of love, of peace, and of grace.  This Divine Wisdom is also within me, guiding me through life as It expresses as me with each breath that I take.  And I am awake to the Presence of Spirit that renews my soul and nourishes my heart.  I am joy and happiness.  I am prosperity and abundance.

Listening to the inner voice, I turn toward forgiveness and welcome the ease with which I can let things go.  I do not need to know why or how or what the reason for the hurt and heartache are.  I remember that feelings of anger do not serve me and I release them with a knowing that I am always loved.  Just as the sun rises each morning, so to does Spirit tell me that I am the beloved, filled with grace. I welcome the wisdom of the Divine that shows me the way forward in every moment.  And I accept my destiny of good, trusting that the highest and best available is seeking me just as I seek it.

I am so grateful for the wisdom of the Divine that allows me to simply flow with each experience.  I am thankful that in letting go of hurt or anger, my heart is renewed and perfect.  And I am filled with gratitude for the unconditional acceptance of exactly who I am, a spiritual being having a human experience.

Seeing the best in Life, I release my word to the Divine Action of the Law, knowing it is already done and made manifest in amazing ways.  And I let it be so.  And so it is.

Photo courtesy of Bethany J. Baker Photography/Flickr

Don't Over-Complicate Forgiveness

It can be a difficult conversation to have.  The one with yourself, that is.  Why have I held on to this grudge for so long?  Why is it so hard to forgive?

There are days when what I'm thinking just doesn't make me feel good.  And I realize it might be time to let go of that long-held grudge that's bringing me down.  But it's not always as easy as simply changing my thoughts to better ones to make me feel good.

I certainly don't want to re-hash the issue with the person I'm resentful of but I do feel I need to have a conversation in order to let go of it.  I liken it to de-cluttering my home from things that have been collecting dust - I need to de-clutter my thoughts.

So, what works for me?  I sit down and write (or type) a letter to myself that lets me explore what  it is I'm thinking that is making me feel bad.

And - I don't make it too complicated.  I simply let it be a free-flow of words or sentences that come to mind as I'm opening up to what I'm holding inside.

So here's a recent issue that I noticed.  I have held on to feelings of resentment against my sister for being the young, cute one that always got what she wanted.  How it shows up for me is that, when I hear of a success she's had, my go-to feeling is jealousy.

Because I really do love my sister, I turn this feeling back towards ME and start to feel guilty that I'm jealous.  Boy, does that bother me.  Because - then I just stew in the back-and-forth emotions.

So, I put pen to paper and started to write:

"It's so crazy that I feel jealous of my sister, especially when she's always so encouraging toward me.  Why do I do that?  Well, I always had to give her my toys when we were young.  And everyone commented on how cute she always looked.  Even in high school, the boys were always chasing her. 

Whoa, is that why I feel jealous?   I never lacked for anything growing up and I had lots of friends too.  In fact, I made the cheer team in high school and I won lots of awards for playing the flute.  I've had a lot in my life that I've loved to do and really enjoyed.  

It's okay that I wasn't cuter than her.  And it's okay that she was always thinner than me.  We are both doing the best we can with what he have."

I keep it simple and short.  And - I may not have gotten to the very root of why I feel jealous with that one letter, but I'm getting closer.

I'm forgiving MYSELF and that's one more step forward to uncovering something that might be holding me back from living the life that is calling my name.

What works for you when you need to have a difficult conversation?  Have you ever checked in with YOU?

Today, I set the intention to remember that forgiveness comes when I can let go of thoughts that make me feel bad.

"Just like gravity or light, beauty is seen as a force that exists everywhere, always.  

From this perspective, our job is less about creating beauty and 

more about seeking it out and recognizing the beauty that already exists in all things."  

~Gregg Braden

"When we allow ourselves to take a breath and tune inwards rather than

 be controlled by external forces, we stop battling with life."  

~Sonia Choquette

Affirmative Prayer:
Opening to the truth that there is only One Life, there is a magnificence to this moment.  The all-good of the Infinite Life is masterful and powerful, overflowing with abundance and prosperity that is revealed in wondrous ways.

Accepting that I am one with Infinite Source, my words are the words of Spirit moving through me.  My actions are the actions of the Divine Love that I call God, expressing as me.  I come into alignment with the knowing that I am an avenue of untold blessings for others and for myself.

Letting go of any jealousy that has gotten in the way of the truth that I am born of great things, I gratefully receive the gifts of the Universe.  Life is always offering Itself up as an experience of grace and harmony and I see clearly my role in every new situation.  I see the potential in every situation for forgiveness and compassion.  With faith, I easily step into being more, beyond what my mind can fathom, trusting that I am guided in all that I do.  I affirm that my thoughts are creating a life where I have more than enough and I open my heart to knowing that something big is seeking to emerge when I simply allow it to.

I give thanks for the blessings that seemingly fall from the sky onto my path.  I am profoundly grateful for the ability to see things in a new way so that I no longer struggle but open to the ease and grace of life.  Thank you, Spirit, for everything that is unfolding in perfect, Divine timing - life is so good!

From this place of good, I release my Word to the Law that moves this into form in bold and beautiful ways. My life is blessed with abundance and prosperity.  And I let it be so.  And so it is.

Photo courtesy of Eternal Sunshine/Flickr